Exponential Ramblings

  Much like the things I own, my thoughts are scattered from the North to South poles. Reaching a sort of equilibrium is tedious and time-consuming. I am in the last couple of days of my research project with the realization that I need more data and more time. The room in the basement is almost done being set up and the puppy and I began sleeping there last night. So far, I am the laundry troll, the bathroom scrubber, and the floor sweeper (as time allows). Realistically, it is a time to make another clean sweep and start over.    I have started over many times and I am no stranger to it. It feels like my life is a constant, never-ending transition. I am curious as to whether or not I am subconsciously choosing this state. I can say that my life is not short on experiences. I would like those experiences to be more travel-based than what it is right now. But home is wherever my family is.    I do get trapped in fantasy worlds on occasion and have to stop fro...

  The research groups that I have been working with over the summer decided to go see that Salem Red Sox last night. I went simply because I have not been to a baseball game since I was eight years old. I held a grudge against baseball for many years. My biological father loved baseball but I didn't for two reasons. My ballet lessons happened to be on the same nights that his company played against other teams. So instead of sacrificing his needs for mine, I was taken out of ballet because of the time conflict. Needless to say, my mom flipped out and I really wanted to go back to ballet. The second reason why is because every time I went to a game, I was always hit by a baseball.    The day had been hot and humid and we were lucky enough to be on the shady side of the field to watch the game. We were not broiling or attacked by gnats. Even though we were watching the game, I do believe that there was a bit more socializing involved than actual game-watching. A couple of ...

  In this post, I am going to give you peek at my super ego. Actually, you have seen her before as she writes the poetry and stories that float amongst the grey matter and dance upon the neurons in my mind. Fair warning, she is a bit arrogant and yet she is sometimes brilliant. Don’t say that I didn’t warn you. She likes to play the most as I drift to sleep and upon the attempt to wake up in the morning. She is a bit of a bitch before the caffeine from the coffee can set her straight for the day.   It still rains in southwest Virginia, the wetness attempting to seep through every pore and crevice of the Earth. It seems as though Goddess believes that the Southern states are in dire need of a good cleansing. For our cleansing, she has decided to move the land, replenish our depleted streams, and knock down old, weak trees in favor of continued growth of what has already begun. However, she is giving the western United States a far different cleansing. Fire burns the l...

  When one takes themselves on a little emotional roller coaster, they must realize at some point that they need to get off of it. The early morning skies have already clouded over in Salem, VA, in preparation for the oncoming storms.   For the Native Americans, rain signifies renewal and growth. Rain and spring are a rebirth of sorts but we are well into summer and the rains keep pouring as the storm clouds pile on top of one another. Normally, a phenomenon called orographic lifting would have dried many of these weather systems as they climbed their way up the Appalachian Mountains. Not lately, the ceilings of these weather systems are much higher this year than last.   They say that depression is living in the past and anxiety is living in the future. I have both mental disabilities. I have lived in the past and the future all at once. For a person like me, we have to choose to live in the present or our fears and exasperation will get the best of us. Until I am give...

  The small wooden and battered boat makes it's way along the shore along the horizon of more building storm clouds. The man in the boat awakens just as beleaguered as the Old Man in the Sea during his last battle. He grabs his oar and paddles towards the shoreline. This beach is not wholly unfamiliar as he has landed here before. Something was different, maybe even a little out of the norm.   The man was met by a shore master and an old man seeking access to the port. The shore master puts his hand up in a halting sign towards the man in the embattled boat. The old man in the boat near him is holding a fluffy, curly-haired white dog with black eyes as deep as the nearest black hole in the sky and the biggest smile a dog could have. It's pink tongue dangling sideways out of it's mouth.   "You may enter," The shore master nods to the old man with the dog. He turns to the man in the boat and tells him, "There is a reason why you cannot enter."   "B...