The Art of Love

  When we are discussing issues and current events, we have a tendency to want to put ideas and situations in nice, stereotypical boxes. There are problems with this ideology as it continues to further seek division among people who agree that there is an underlying issue but cannot agree on what is the best way to change the circumstances. In many ways, it feels like the art of negotiation and compromise are lost, whether it is in politics or in our own homes.
   What I think we can all agree on is that what we want is not only best for ourselves, but what is best for our families, friends, and the community. Maybe the real issue in the starting of a New Year is not losing weight or learning new things. Maybe it is learning to be a better person through the strongest force known to mankind, love.


  • Self Love. Self love is not only about taking care of your appearance and health. Self love is also about becoming a better person. It is about intangible ideals such as openness to new ideas and theories. It is about opening your heart and your mind to where it was closed once before. It is wanting better and deepening relationships with the people in your life and accepting new possibilities. 
  • Love with Family. These are the people you are most comfortable being yourself around. They have seen the worst and the best in you. I make greater attempts to warn my family when I might be obnoxious because most of the time it is me dealing with my inner self and not them. This might be a good time to give them a break from your personality and seek to bridge the gap in your relationships. Why? Because these relationships are a good indicator of how you will treat your friends and romantic relationships. I will run away from a man that had problems with his mother unless I know the whole story and I have met his mother. Men, women look at your family relationships when they are considering you as a partner. Keep that in mind.
  • Love with Friends. Or as I call them, extended family. You are like the five people closest to you. Have many bromances and girl crushes. There is nothing wrong with that. Platonic love is one of the sweetest and most fulfilling loves available. Why? Lack of judging you. They judge the situation that is forcing you to act a certain way not what they know to be true to you, emotionally and mentally.
  • Romantic Love. Forget the "Proper Care and Feeding of a Man" or "Mars vs. Venus" these models don't exist. Stop looking at people as shallow puddles in the Gene Pool. You know what makes a good story and a good book? Character complexity. Humans are complex. They're like ogres, they have many layers. What you are looking for with romantic love is a bond that is unexplicable. Where your love interest(s) and you, go above and beyond the call of duty to make the everyday work and more exciting. Romantic love is still you versus you, not you versus them. It's about being each other's cheerleader, mutual respect, and being a partner in life. It's about being a better person because of who you surround yourself with. This is not the 1950s. We are in a new millenium and we can define romantic love anyway we see fit. 
   One last thing that I want to mention is how you react to people and yourself. Most people don't have time or energy to be out to get you or go out of their way to upset you. You are in absolute control of how you react to people. You are also in control of how to react to any new information that comes your way. Are you going to give in to societal expectations and react? Or are you going to consider the information, do a little research from various sources, and find the middle ground in the topic? The latter is what scientists do but anyone can do it. It takes practice. Keep practicing the art of love. 

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